Since I have come back from my long long long holiday, the first question everyone ends up asking is "how was ur chutti" and to most people I give a monosyllabic reply that it was wonderful. Then I get pestered for more details where I just end the conversation by saying –hmmm…errr I went to Vegas with Mommy.
Almost everyone who knows me, knows that my mommy is an involuntarily funny slightly conservative gujju aunty who frowns vigorously at alcohol, men and bikinis (Don't get me wrong, at times she is quite cool). So thought of putting down the ways of “How to be extremely pious in Sincity J”
I had been given this brilliant advice to go and play at the casino floor in Bellagio, cause if you ask for Sparkling wine they serve Moet!!!!
Almost everyone who knows me, knows that my mommy is an involuntarily funny slightly conservative gujju aunty who frowns vigorously at alcohol, men and bikinis (Don't get me wrong, at times she is quite cool). So thought of putting down the ways of “How to be extremely pious in Sincity J”
I had been given this brilliant advice to go and play at the casino floor in Bellagio, cause if you ask for Sparkling wine they serve Moet!!!!
Forget Moet, with mommy around all you want to do is go and see the musical fountains outside Bellagio (which were pretty but………….)
If you are lucky and find a seat right next to a super-hot guy with a big chip stake on those rare $5 blackjack tables, do not start a conversation or blush at his compliments as Mommy will zero in on that and come running to drag you from that table to a solo player slot machine where you will never get lucky (Pun intended).
Do not order any alcohol at your casino table and ensure that your neighbours have also kept their glasses away from you as in case Mommy decides to pay the table a visit, she will give you suspicious looks and interrogate you at the table itself.
Also be ready to hear the motherly judgemental comments on skimpy wardrobe. Cause every time Mommy sees girls on road in bikinis, the first thought that pops into her head is how do parents allow their children to step out in such little clothes.
Do not expect to go partying in Vegas as it will bring out the Mommy frown. We crossed the Beach Club at Wynn where David Guetta was playing and there were 100s of shirtless six pack abs standing in the queue. All I could manage was a quick glance and bucketful of regret at the lost opportunity.
Vegas has all the fancy chefs and you may go and eat at all fancy places owned by Bobby Bay or Wolfgang Puck or Buddy Valastro (all awesome food) but at the end you will go looking for an Indian restaurant as the desi food craving would get overpowering. But on this one I just don’t hold Mommy responsible; we all had the desi cravings. Also let me add here that the gujju thepla myth is true, even we started our roadtrip with a significantly large number of theplas.
Thank god Mommy has been kept away from social media all this time or I would be getting an earful bout this post at this very moment.
Anyway I think some time in the near future, I will go back to Vegas just to SIN.
If you are lucky and find a seat right next to a super-hot guy with a big chip stake on those rare $5 blackjack tables, do not start a conversation or blush at his compliments as Mommy will zero in on that and come running to drag you from that table to a solo player slot machine where you will never get lucky (Pun intended).
Do not order any alcohol at your casino table and ensure that your neighbours have also kept their glasses away from you as in case Mommy decides to pay the table a visit, she will give you suspicious looks and interrogate you at the table itself.
Also be ready to hear the motherly judgemental comments on skimpy wardrobe. Cause every time Mommy sees girls on road in bikinis, the first thought that pops into her head is how do parents allow their children to step out in such little clothes.
Do not expect to go partying in Vegas as it will bring out the Mommy frown. We crossed the Beach Club at Wynn where David Guetta was playing and there were 100s of shirtless six pack abs standing in the queue. All I could manage was a quick glance and bucketful of regret at the lost opportunity.
Vegas has all the fancy chefs and you may go and eat at all fancy places owned by Bobby Bay or Wolfgang Puck or Buddy Valastro (all awesome food) but at the end you will go looking for an Indian restaurant as the desi food craving would get overpowering. But on this one I just don’t hold Mommy responsible; we all had the desi cravings. Also let me add here that the gujju thepla myth is true, even we started our roadtrip with a significantly large number of theplas.
Thank god Mommy has been kept away from social media all this time or I would be getting an earful bout this post at this very moment.
Anyway I think some time in the near future, I will go back to Vegas just to SIN.
@ Fake Canals outside Venetian in Vegas |
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